Keys

I've been back in New York for just over a week.  It feels weird. I know I love living here; I know that this is where I want to live for the rest of my life.  It's just that, at the moment, I'm having a bit of trouble remembering WHY. 

A good friend is encouraging me to enjoy every minute of this strange feeling of feeling not at home at home.  And I like that idea, so that's what I'm planning to do. 

I have lots of friends who do lots of long-term traveling, with some of them living abroad for years on end, so what I'm experiencing now is probably old news to them.  But this summer was the first time I was out of the U.S. for more than a month, and that second month really did a number on my ability to come back without noticing a strange thing or two about my life here. I'm trying to figure out how to explain it, so until I'm fully adjusted, I'm going to try to figure it out here. 

When I got back last week, my mom and nephew met me at my apartment to hand over my keys.  I was fresh from 25 hours of traveling with just about three hours of sleep thrown in despite two sleeping "aids," so I was not on point. My mom handed me my keys, a jangling bundle of no less than 13 keys and I thought, and then said,  "There must be some mistake, all of these keys can't possibly be mine."  But they were mine alright, and I have spent many years carrying all of these keys with me every day.  For the past two months, I wore a single key on a piece of berimbau cord around my neck, which is apparently enough time to become accustomed to only wearing a single key on a cord around one's neck.  But then there I was, back at my home, which still didn't feel quite like my home yet, with a bundle of keys (to my apartment, my mom's apartment, my sister's apartment, my friend's office, my mailbox, my bike lock....) that also didn't feel like mine.

My first day back, I carried those key around as I ran errands around Brooklyn.  I'll state the obvious by saying that they represent my life here -- and that I wasn't quite ready to carry that life around, all jingling and silver in my handbag.  My second day back, I separated the keys into smaller bundles and now leave what I don't need for the day at home.  Seems simple enough, and it was simple enough.  With fewer keys, my return to the speed of daily life here slowed down a bit -- just enough for me to handle it.

Don't get me wrong -- I'm glad to be back.  But it is weird. 

Winding down

I'm in my last week of my Brazilian vacation. I'm so glad I extended trip my trip by two weeks -- it would have been too rushed to leave on the 25th as previously planned. So much has happened since I've been here, and I've learned a lot of things about myself, Brazilian culture and life.

Here's a quick list of what comes to mind when I think of all I've learned:
* How to make and fly a kite, Rio de Janeiro style
* How to train macaco in a way that makes sense to my body
* How to actually do a macaco paulista
* How to do mei lua de compasso de raizes
* How to drive a motorcycle (don't worry mom, it was just in a parking lot)
* How to jump any bike over any curb
* How to make firm plans with a Brazilian man by acting as if you aren't actually making a firm plan
* How to call a waiter over to the table in that sort of rude, but typical and normal Brazilian way, by calling out "Oi -- moco" or "Amigao" while waving him over with your hand
* How to listen to and politely decline a way-too-soon marriage proposal from a smitten admirer
* How to wear a teeny bikini with grace and attitude
* How to apply the perfect combination of sunblock and bronzer
* How to play safely, strongly and com muito divertido and respect in a street roda
* How to relax deeply for extended periods of time without feeling guilty
* How to work a little while playing a lot
* How to take capoeira less seriously (which oddly enough results in begin a better capoeirista)

I am ready to come home (I really miss my mom, sister, nephew and bed), but am still sad to leave.  Luckily, I've already learned how to maintain strong long distance friendships, so I know that I won't actually be leaving anything or anyone behind here. But for now, there are still a few more days to fill with friends and sunshine -- so off I go!